What an amazing time it is to be alive. Spring is just around the corner, Major League Baseball is finally trying to speed up baseball games, and Melania’s husband has his tit in a wringer from his infidelity. Just think of it! Springtime in America!

It is a brainstem-level reflex for Melania’s Teflon Don to claim that every single accusation of malfeasance is politically motivated. Of course, this in itself is a political ploy. Like the Alien, Melania’s husband just keeps showing up. Remember how Ellen Ripley finally rid herself of the Alien?

Will the supporters of Melania’s husband ever give up on him? Given the prolonged tolerance of his incompetence and serial bad behavior, it seems doubtful.

Remember kids, if you are going to tell a lie, tell a big one and repeat it often! That way you can keep kicking the can down the road while people struggle to keep up with you.