I have nothing constructive to add here, but it’s just too funny to leave alone. A scandal has hit the news. Cracker Barrel has announced they are offering a new plant-based sausage on their menu. It has resulted in an flood of outrage on the interwebs. Here in the land of the free and the home of the brave, indignant customers are venting their outrage over an optional menu item as a menacing sign of what is to come.
The US Navy may be adding it to their menu, sparking righteous indignation from our very own pistol packin’ Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO). It was proposed for the 2023 defense budget. Boebert cried out that it is “liberal woke garbage”. It’s a new food choice for our sailors, Lauren. You are crying wolf again.
According to a source that I don’t trust and never quote, the New York Post, Tejas Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX) voted against it in 2021. In a Twitter thread, he exclaimed
“A woke military that drafts our daughters, wastes resources on Green New Deal garbage, holds no one accountable for Afghanistan disaster, and prioritizes playing leftist politics over destroying our enemies,” he wrote in the thread. “Rep. Roy voted no.”
Oh! The horror of it! A vegan meat substitute is an example of wokeness, they rage. To be woke is to be aware of social injustice and to tolerate the choices of other people. But to the lunatic fringe, it is a crime against MAGA land.
It will be interesting to see what the restaurant does about this, if anything. It is an amusing tempest in a teapot.
Lamentations on Chemistry 
Perhaps those who are upset about the new menu item might wish to hold a protest in front of their neighborhood Cracker Barrel. Maybe a hot dog eating contest. And a boycott of all Crackers and Barrels of whatever stripe.
Ever been to a Cracker Barrel? The food is good and the servings are large. It is a meat and potatoes kind of place. To get in and out you have to walk through a gift shop.
Short answer, yes.
The food is what it’s supposed to be and the portions are generous. A middle-America kind of place. The sort of restaurant you’d take a foreign visitor to show him a slice of middle American life.
And, not all of those who dine there are Crackers.
Every time I’ve been there I’ve had a great meal. Of course, I come from deeply redneck ancestry. It is the only place that I’m aware of that sells teaberry and clove chewing gum.