The Department of Symbolism at Poltroon University in Guapo, Arizona, is proud to announce that Representative George Santos (R, NY) has been awarded the Arthur E. and Katherine T. Slush Foundation Chair in Mendacity Studies. University Distinguished Professor Santos will deliver a seminar on Friday, April 7, in the John Wilkes Booth Auditorium at 4:30 pm on the “History of American Mendacity”. Coffee and cookies will be served at 4:00.

If I’m going to that talk I’ll need something stronger than coffee and cookies.
I’ve found that sitting in the front row tends to suppress somnolence.
At all the seminars I attended during my grad school years, the front row was reserved for senior faculty. It never stopped some of them from dozing off from time to time.
Ok. Good point.